#survivalmode

When I was a stay-at-home mom with my oldest, I was drowning.⁣⁣

⁣⁣Barely keeping my head above water.⁣⁣

⁣⁣Every single morning, I’d lay on the playroom floor while she played around me. Unable to motivate myself enough to get up and DO something. Then by afternoon, the reality of our house would hit and I would plop her in front of the tv and clean like a mad woman - barely making a dent.⁣⁣

⁣⁣Sometimes I would just get so overwhelmed that I would just pretend the messes weren’t there. It was almost paralyzing thinking about beginning, so I just wouldn’t.⁣⁣

⁣⁣And you know what I regret the most about that?⁣⁣

⁣⁣That instead of being present for my time home with her, I was simply surviving.⁣⁣

⁣⁣I wasn’t able to enjoy her fully and be super intentional and purposeful, I was just trying to stay awake and keep her alive through another day.⁣⁣

⁣⁣And the thing is, seasons of survival are 100% normal.....⁣⁣

⁣⁣.....but YEARS of it don’t have to be.⁣⁣

⁣⁣Now that I have the privilege of staying home with my youngest, I’ve noticed very simple shifts in how different things are.⁣⁣

⁣⁣I’m not constantly worrying about what’s next to do in the house if I take an hour to play soccer with her outside.⁣⁣

⁣⁣I’m not stressing out about the piles of stuff around us as I try to focus on reading her a book.⁣⁣

⁣⁣When she says “mommy, I have to tell you something” - I can listen to her with my eyes and not nod along with a “uh huh coooool” as I scurry along to the next chore.⁣⁣

⁣⁣Does that mean we don’t have tough days? Survival mode days?⁣⁣

⁣⁣HEEEEEECK NO.⁣⁣

⁣⁣Of course we do! I’m human. So is she. We live in an imperfect world and LIFE happens.⁣⁣

⁣⁣I’m not special.⁣⁣

⁣⁣I didn’t win anything.⁣⁣

⁣⁣I’m not better than anyone.⁣⁣

⁣⁣I simply discovered this life-giving world of less, and I can’t wait for you to experience the same.⁣⁣

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